How to help kids make friends on holiday in Spain comes down to timing more than anything else: go to the playground when Spanish children are there, which is after 6pm for most of the year and after 8pm in summer. Add two or three words of Spanish, something to share and a few days in the same place, and most children under ten will find someone to play with on their own.
The rest of this piece covers the details that make the difference, from the best places to look to what to do if your child is shy.
Why Spanish playgrounds are empty at 3pm
British families often arrive at the park straight after lunch and wonder where everyone is. Spain runs later. Lunch is the main meal, usually between 2pm and 4pm, and in summer many families stay indoors until the worst of the heat has passed. Children come out again in the evening, often with grandparents, and stay until dinner at 9pm or later.
So the same playground that is deserted at 3pm can be full at 7pm. If your children are used to a 7pm bedtime, a holiday is a good moment to let it slip by an hour or two. Spanish children are up late in summer, and so are their parents, sitting on the benches around the play area.
How to help kids make friends on holiday in Spain, place by place
Some settings make friendships much easier than others.
The neighbourhood square. In most Spanish towns and city districts, the plaza with a small playground and a café is where local families gather in the evening. In Málaga, the Plaza de la Merced has one right in the centre of the old town; in Seville, the Alameda de Hércules has several play areas and is busy until late.
Municipal swimming pools. In summer, the public outdoor pools (piscinas municipales) are full of local children and much cheaper than hotel pools. Entry is usually a few euros. Children who meet in the shallow end tend to find each other again the next day.
The beach, early evening. City beaches such as La Malvarrosa in Valencia or La Misericordia in Málaga fill up with local families after 6pm, when the sun is lower. Bring a bucket, spades and a ball.
Summer day camps. Many Spanish towns run campamentos urbanos in July, and in Catalonia they are called casals d'estiu. Some take children for a single week, and a few accept visitors who are not registered locally. Ask at the local town hall or sports centre in spring, because places go quickly.
Local fiestas. Almost every town has a summer fiesta with fairground rides, music and children running around until midnight. Children who would never approach each other at a museum will play together at a fair.
How to help a shy child make friends abroad
A shy child will not walk up to a group of children speaking a language they don't understand. That's normal. A few things help:
- Arrive early, before the playground is full. It's easier to join one or two children than a big group.
- Bring something to share: a ball, chalk, bubbles or a skipping rope. Spanish children will usually come over to look, and the game starts without anyone having to talk.
- Teach three phrases before you go: "¿Cómo te llamas?" (what's your name?), "¿Quieres jugar?" (do you want to play?) and "¿Puedo jugar?" (can I play?).
- Go back to the same place several days in a row. On the second evening the other children will remember your child, and the first move is half made.
- Talk to the parents yourself. If you chat to the mum on the next bench, the children often follow your lead.
Spanish adults are generally relaxed about children from other families joining in, and grandparents in particular will happily start a conversation, even with very little English.
What changes with age
Under-fives play alongside other children more than with them, so language barely matters. A sandpit and a few toys are enough.
Between six and ten, a shared game is the way in. Football is the obvious one in Spain, and children who don't speak a word of each other's language can play for two hours without a problem.
Over-tens and teenagers are harder. They need a reason to be together: a surf lesson, a sailing course, a multi-activity camp or a local club with sessions open to visitors. Short courses in coastal towns often mix Spanish and foreign children, which is the best setting for this age group.
Staying longer makes it easier
Children make friends faster when they see the same faces. A week in one town works better than three nights in each of three cities. If you're spending a month or more in Spain, a summer camp or a few weeks of an after-school activity in September gives your children something close to local life.
For families who are thinking of moving rather than visiting, this guide on how to make friends after moving to Spain with kids covers the school run and the first year. If you're planning a shorter trip, the ideas for October half-term in Málaga with kids include several parks and squares where local children play.
Meeting a family before you arrive
The quickest route to a holiday friendship is to meet a local family with children of the same age. Your children get a guide to the best playground in town; you get someone to ask where to have lunch at 2pm without a tourist menu. This guide on how to meet local families when travelling in Spain with kids explains where it happens most naturally.
If it doesn't happen
Some holidays end without a new friend, and that's fine. A child who spent a week watching other children play football in the square has still picked up a few words of Spanish and a sense of how things work, which makes the next trip easier. Don't push a reluctant child into a group; a quieter evening with a book on the bench next to the playground often leads to the invitation they wouldn't have accepted the day before.
A few things to keep in mind
Spanish children often call adults by their first name and are used to being greeted with a kiss on each cheek. Your children don't have to do the same, but it helps if they know what's coming.
Playground rules are looser than in the UK. Children climb higher, play later and wander a little further from their parents. Keep an eye on yours as you would at home, and don't be surprised if a Spanish parent seems less worried than you.
And if a friendship does start, swap a contact with the parents before you leave. Some of the best holiday friendships come back the next summer.
Woltica's travelling families circle helps with exactly this: you can find a local family in the city you're visiting, with children of a similar age, and meet up somewhere public, at a park, on a walk or over lunch. You can have a look at Woltica before you travel.